I did something I promised myself I wouldn't do. I missed a week. Sometimes life gets in the way of plans. I want to be honest in explaining why I missed a week. The whole point of this project was to try to help me focus on myself again. Somewhere along my path, I've lost my way. I let other peoples opinions and words shape who I've become and it's not something that I'm proud of. I use to have so many wonderful dreams. Life, money, family sometimes gets in the way. So I started this project. It was going to give me a year of little achievements, while I focus on what I've should have been focusing on all this time. MYSELF!
I recently let someone in my life. Someone who I grew to trust and like. Perhaps, I was being foolish, but I really let myself believe in someone else again. It ended. In an abrupt way, that I'm still feeling the whiplash on how fast the light was switched off. It makes me wonder how my instincts are so off and it makes me doubt myself. However, I have decided I will not let a man define who I am or what I do. I will not think I'm the reason for another failure in that relationship department. I will take partial blame, but I will not let it consume me anymore. I'm going to try to put myself first...and realize we are ALL screwed up a little. So I needed a week to grieve. I take things to heart and when I finally decide to let someone in my life I let them in fully. That is why I don't understand how people can be so cruel. I optimistically want to believe that everyone is a good person. I know that people come into your life for a reason, and now I know that they exit your life for a reason too. Even if you never know what that reason is, you have to accept it and more on.
No MORE wallowing in sadness (hopefully), and back on track with my project. Since I missed last week, I doubled up this week. Alas, the projects were not exciting, but they were new.
My first new think was trying an electronic reader. I love to read. Love it. I love curling up on a couch on a winters day with a good book. I love the feeling of holding books. Therefore the transition to the B&N Nook was different to me. So far so good...
The 2nd new adventure this week was going to Agatha's Murder Mystery Theatre. It was a blast. It was a spoof on the Grinch who Stole Christmas, open bar, good people. I even had a part! I miss theatre (sometimes)...
I know this is short, but I wanted to write...I don't want to get behind and I want to keep this project up. This week, I plan to not apologize to ANYONE all week. If you know me, this WILL be extremely challenging. Especially, during this time in my life. But I'm gonna do my best! Wish me luck!
